REVIEW: Beetlejuice Beetlejuice

In the age of the resurrected franchise, the Beetlejuice sequel has finally clawed its way out of Development Hell and into whatever passes for reality these days. It's something that we've said about a lot of movies lately, but this really is a film that didn't need to happen. Still, that doesn't mean it isn't a lot of fun.

Decades of cancellations and delays spared us from Beetlejuice Goes Hawaiian and other questionable sequel ideas. The fact that 36 years have passed since the original Beetlejuice means that the new movie has a clear basis for a story, able to explore how the characters of the original have developed and to exposea new generation to the utterly bizarre world that Tim Burton created. Or, to put it another way, to see how this stuff holds up with fans of the original beyond pure nostalgia, and whether kids today will lap it up the way their parents did.

Of course, while we have Tim Burton, Michael Keaton, Winona Ryder and Catherine O'Hara all returning to their roles behind or in front of the camera, not everyone involved in the original was able to be involved, or indeed welcome. There's no sign of Geena Davis and Alec Baldwin (too old); Glenn Shadix (too dead); or Jeffrey Jones (too nonce). While the Maitlands are mentioned often, their absence is dealt with in a single throwaway line; still, better that than using yet more CGI de-aging to make Davis and Baldwin resemble their younger selves, as ageless ghosts should. Richard Deetz, on the other hand, is surprisingly embraced by the film, which is both decent and hilarious. Jones may be persona non grata, but his character is still a good guy and loved by his family, with the actor's absense being lampshaded through the use of an impersonation, stop-motion animation and, finally, just removing the character's head.

Keaton has aged as well, of course, but given how much make-up he was under as Beetlejuice (or Betelgeuse if you're old school) it doesn't matter so much. Hell, they probably had to use less make-up this time round. He steps back into the role like he never left, and is clearly having a whale of a time. He's used sparingly, which is wise; too much and he'd overwhelm the story, and his schtick would get tiresome.

Winona Ryder remains central, and so she should; Lydia was the heroine of the original (and, I'm pretty sure, my first screen crush, so I may have a biased interest here). Her character is well written, and she performs it beautifully: still the same quirky goth from 1988, but weighed down by the intervening years' strife and the trauma of her first brush with Beetlejuice. It's good to see that she's closer to her father and stepmother, and is now experiencing the same treatment from her own daughter. Having her present a show about her ghostly encounters is perfect; it's just a shame that creep Rory is dragging her down. Lydia grows considerably during the course of the film, taking back control of her life and even facing Beetlejuice without fear when she knew he was the only one who could help her daughter.

Catherine O'Hara is just as brilliant as ever, giving us an older, wiser, not quite as volatile Delia. The new cast are all pretty excellent. Jenna Ortega is perhaps too obvious casting for the next generation of pretty, sulky goth teen, but she's spot on as Astrid, undergoing her own growth and being a likeable character even as she infuriates with her dismissal of her mother. Justin Theroux is brilliant as the instantly-hateable Rory, a character you just can't wait to see get his comeuppance. (Nice of the writers to name a heroine after my daughter and a villain after my dog, by the way.) Arthur Conti, a virtual unknown, is excellent as the charming yet underhanded Jeremy, Astrid's love interest. He's definitely at the beginning of a stellar career.

Among the side characters, Willem Dafoe is predictably brilliant as actor-turned-ghost-turned-cop Wolf Jackson, and Burn Gorman is hilarious as the heavy-drinking, scripture-babbling Father Damien. Monica Bellucci, though, is sorely underused. She looks incredible as Delores, Beetlejuice's ex-wife/widow(?) and the sexiest zombie since Liv Moore, but she's scarcely in it and is more of a plot contrivance than a character. Bellucci deserves more than that. Still, her existence does explain that ring-bearing finger in Beetlejuice's pocket in the original (he must have put it back with the rest of her between films). There are a couple of fun cameos too, which are probably best left unspoiled.

So, we have a great cast performing some strong material. Unfortunately, the film itself is pretty incoherent. There's some great material in here, with some truly surreal moments, but the plot is convoluted and often breaks down into a series of sketches than a solid story, none of them funny enough to justify this approach. With multiple antagonists running around and continual twists and revelations, things never get boring, although the Big Twist that kicks off the endgame is howlingly obvious. 

I dread to say it, though, but Beetlejuice itself wasn't that great a film. It's a cult classic, it's utterly unique (until now, at least) and those who watched it around the right age adore it, but it's objectively an indulgent mess. So it's not a surprise that Beetlejuice Beetlejuice is too. That doesn't mean I didn't have a great time watching it; it's got everything you could really want from a Beetlejuice sequel, evne if that means you know pretty much exactly what you're getting. (You love sandworms? I love sandworms!) It suffers, like a lot of modern films, from a trailer that paints something of a false picture (at least one joke falls flat, largely because a much better version was used in the trailer), but even so, you know what to expect going in. Judging by the stellar performance its had in the box office, that's precisely what audiences want. 

Which is a good thing, because it's now inevitable that Beetlejuice Beetlejuice Beetlejuice will be along in short order. Will it be good? Just like this, objectively not. But who cares when it's this much fun?

REVIEW: Space Dandy Picture Dramas

So it turns out there's a whole bunch of extra Space Dandy eps I never knew about! The Space Dandy Picture Dramas are short-form mini-episodes with simplified animation - more like motion comics. There are only five of them and mostly clock in at under ten minutes, so it works out as equivalent to roughly two proper episodes. These were apparently only ever made available on the Japanese complete series Blu-Ray release, so know wonder I hadn't heard of them.

Fortunately, some lovely person has uploaded them to a playlist on YouTube so we can all enjoy them. Naturally, these are only in Japanese, which is a shame as I adore the English dub performances, but there are subtitles on all of them. A wonderful Tumblr-er called "futuristic-roomba" (that's QT, right?) posted about them, and I've taken the titles from her post, even if they are apparently a bit questionable. Although I've Dandied them up a bit!

They're a mixed bunch and I've written my brief thoughts below. If you want to avoid spoilers, go click on the link above and watch them first.

1. BooBies Pair Adventure, Baby!

This short is a great start to the little series, although it's an oddity in that Dandy is barely in it, showing up for a few seconds at the end (he's been rendered indisposed by a bad case of the trots). This instead focuses on Meow and QT on their own adventure with Honey and Candy. If you don't remember Candy, don't feel bad; she's barely been in it before, briefly appearing in ep. 1-2, “The Search for the Phantom Space Ramen, Baby." She's fun though; I like her just as much as Honey and she has cute hair,

This is good fun. It's close to the standard art style of the series, just with less animation, which is an easy way in but makes it visually less interesting than the other shorts. Seeing two BooBies waitresses trying to become alien hunters is an entertaining way to spend nine minutes, especially as they seem to be completely amoral. (Judging by what we've seen over the series, Dandy and co. are probably the most ethical alien hunters out there.)

I Know This Planet, Baby: Planet Daga is an unreal world where anything you imagine becomes reality - but only within the space of the planet.

2. It's a Launderette from Hell, Baby! 

This is my favourite of the five shorts. The art style is appealing, a sketchbook style with dark, moody hues, which suits the story and the still-art nature of the shorts. This is a full-on Dandy heavy adventure, showing him at his most heroic as he rescues the Ugglies from indentured servitude. It's a pretty serious one, really, dealing as it does with people trafficking and modern slavery. I do love the idea that every launderette/laundromat in the universe links to this one planet and everything is actually washed by hand.

We're Alien Hunters, Baby: The Ugglies are rotund, fish-faced creatures with huge lips and teeth. They come from the Planet Uggly (pronounced to sound like "kiss" which clearly only works in Japanese). They can't write but they can sure fight.

3. Cheerful Wake Me Up, Baby! 

Another great little episode, a QT-focused one which works as a follow-up to 1-13, "Even Vacuum Cleaners Fall in Love, Baby." It gives an insight into QT's existence, as part of a mass-produced line of robots that are visually indistinguishable and can be disposed of and replaced on a whim. It's really the second short in a row that deals with a form of slavery, but none of it gets heavy. 

It's pretty heartwarming, with QT showing how he's grown as an individual and starting to inspire his fellow hoovers, and Dandy showing that he can recognise him and values him. They're a crew, even if they spend most of the time bitching at each other. Nice, drawn-style artwork here, simple and colourful, which suits the story.

4. The Road to Debut is Harsh, Baby! 

I didn't like this one. I don't know, maybe I'm missing the point of it, but it just isn't very interesting or fun. The sloppy, hand-drawn, felt-tip artwork is a big step-down from the others. It's something different and makes this short stand out, but it just doesn't look good.

This one isn't really a Space Dandy story at all, more of a background story. It's all very meta, with Tohn Jravolta auditioning for a role in the series. He's just an ordinary looking guy here, nothing like the Jravolta in 2-9, "We're All Fools, So Let's All Dance, Baby." That guy was a gold-skinned, almost mechanical-looking alien. I guess that's him in costume, and underneath it is this guy. Regardless, this is pretty boring. I assumed the judging panel would turn out to be Dandy and co. but they're actually a bunch of dogs.

5. Let's Take a Bath Again, Baby!

Easily the most meta of them all, and given this is Space Dandy we're talking about, that's meta indeed. Set right after the final episode of the series, in which, lest we forget, the universe ended. Is this the new universe 14.8 billion years later, when we've come full circle? Seems unlikely, as everyone remembers what happened in the finale. 

Of course, that's a pointless question, when the characters are sitting around discussing the show. Incorporating the fourth short as well, we have fictional characters auditioning to play fictional characters, who then sit around discussing their fiction, in character.

Bringing back Space Trucker Dandy and Lady Meow is a nice touch, as they were the most Dandy-ish of the alternative versions appearing in 2-1, "I Can't be the Only One, Baby." I could've done without meeting Manga Hero Dandy again, though. He's just as annoying as ever, and turns out to be really rapey as well. At least he's seen off by the others. This short is a lot of fun, with a really effective artstyle, and makes for a nice final ending to the Dandyverse.

I Know This Planet, Baby: From the look of the plants and the moon in the sky, we might finally be seeing Dandy on Earth.

Important! Please help my friend in dire need of housing support

Cat for attention

My friend Rosie has started a GoFundMe campaign to try to raise money to help our mutual friend B.

B is disabled, fleeing a violent home and has been rendered effectively homeless after years of housing problems. 

I realise that everyone is skint and that there are a lot of crowdfund campaigns for people in need, but if you do happen to have a few quid to spare, please consider donating it to B's fund. It really could make all the difference. If we share this widely enough and enough people donate, we can raise enough to get her housed safely, and that could honestly be the difference between life and death for her.

Seriously, B is amazing but she has been royally screwed over by people and the system. She needs our help.

More details at the link.

https://www.gofundme.com/f/my-friend-n-a-homeless-disabled-woman-who-has-fled-violence

Thank you

WHO REVIEW: Deathworld

Deathworld is the first Big Finish release I've been excited for for quite a while. The latest in The Lost Stories range, this is based on a story treatment submitted by Bob Baker and Dave Martin, classic Who's big ideas men, for Doctor Who's tenth season. It never got further than that, being scrapped in favour of their second idea, which became The Three Doctors. It's very similar to the broadcast story in many ways: all (then) three Doctors appear, the Time Lords are involved, UNIT HQ is beseiged, and the Doctors and their companions are sent to another world outside of their reality.

It's a far more esoteric adventure, however. Instead of facing a disembodied Time Lord in a universe of antimatter, the Doctor is forced to battle Death himself, in his realm beyond time. It's a wonderfully out there idea for Doctor Who, and I've long been fascinated by it as a road not taken. It wouldn't have been completely out of place back in season ten - only one story before the Doctor fought the Minotaur in Atlantis and stood in the vortex facing a god that ate time itself, and in the sixties there were occasional trips beyond reality, to the Land of Fiction of the Celestial Toyroom. Now, of course, the idea of the Doctor facing the Grim Reaper in the afterlife doesn't seem unlikely at all, in the series' new "gods and monsters" phase.

From the sounds of it, this is one of those Lost Stories where there was little more than an outline to go from, so BF writer John Dorney has basically created the entire script from scratch. It's great work; it fair zips along, with the occasional quieter to focus on loss and the philosophy of death. The dialogue is, for the most part, very strong; only once do the characters fall into the trap of describing what they're seeing instead of reacting to it, which makes it better than a lot of BF scripts. Dorney peppers the script with little references to other adventures (the First Doctor asking if the Brigadier is related to Bret Vyon was fun), and his use of the odd phrase or paraphrase from The Three Doctors itself seems appropriate, given that surely some of Baker and Martin's material would have ended up in either version.

There are some irritating bits. Having the different Doctors discovering the same thing then reporting to each other gets repetitive. Why the Brigadier refers to himself as such, instead of his actual name, is a mystery, although this is far from the first story to include that. Looking at the story itself, while it's fun to have the First Doctor and the Brig team up, and it's something we never got to see on TV, it's also a shame one of the First Doctor's companions doesn't take part. This is, I presme, due to who the production team thought they could get involved at the time.

Indeed, they were pretty overconfident there, since in the event Frazer Hines was unavailable to play Jamie, while Hartnell was too unwell to be involved fully, necessitating some serious rewriting. It's wonderful to be able to hear a full team-up of the first three Doctors, their different personalities brought into focus by their interactions with Jamie, Jo and the Brig, as they're busy sniping at each other. Using Death as the antagonist is a clever way to frame the meeting of different Doctors; as they discuss, they are to each other a reminder of their mortality, albeit a very different kind of mortality to humanity's. 

Interestingly, the story involved a number of elements that, by coincidence, appeared in the latest season on TV. While the version of Death here is miles away from Sutekh as God of Death, they fundementally come from the same idea. There are more specific moments that line up; there's even an army tricked into fighting itself. Other parts are hard to imagine televised Doctor Who fully committing to then or now; armies of zombies would either push the boundaries of what the programme could get away with, or be so neutered for the teatime slot as to be pointless. It's one of these time when audio is a benefit; we can let our imaginations run wild, without concern for budget or viewer sensibilities.

There is, however, a fundamental drawback to this whole endeavour. Since the first three Doctors are now long dead, Big Finish relies on its squadron of impersonators to recreate them for this story. Stephen Noonan stands in for William Hartnell; Michael Troughton for his father Patrick; and Tim Treloar is now well-established as Jon Pertwee's understudy. As well as the Doctors, Jon Culshaw portrays the Brigadier in place of the late Nick Courtney. Happily, Frazer Hines and Katy Manning are still with us, but it does make for a strangely distant experience. It does fit with the theme of death and loss, though, and for the most part, the impressions are strong. At times, they're uncannily accurate, while other times they're wildly off, but they're mainly solid so it doesn't detract from the story.

Hats off to Joe Shire as Death himself, as well as his three fellow apocalyptic horsemen. He gives a powerful, sinister, yet oddly avuncular performance as the personification of Death. Joe's got a number of Big Finish credits to his name now (notably he's a regular in Torchwood Soho), but his first turn as main villain is a triumph. Good work, Uncle Joe! Dianne Pilkington gives a good performance against him as the overconfident Lady President of Gallifrey.

The climax to the story does fall under the somewhat frustrating category that undoes the adventure, but it doesn't feel like a cop-out, unlike some. In this case, it's in keeping with the dream-like, otherworldly nature of the story. I'm not keen on the range's continued insistence to force its releases into existing continuity, clumsily segueing here into The Three Doctors. It's far better to let these "what if?" stories remain in their own, unique little universes. Still, it doesn't undo what is a fun adventure, and one that worth waiting for through the recent delays.

Placement: As Dorney has gone to pains to fit this into established continuity, we might as well have a try. As previously noted, for the Third Doctor, Jo and the Brigadier, this leads directly into The Three Doctors. 

For the Second Doctor and Jamie, it's a little trickier. They're one their way to pick up Victoria, and Jamie mentions experiments by the Sontarans, clearly setting this after The Two Doctors. However, neither of them recognises the Brigadier, so from their perspective it's also before The Web of Fear. This means that The Two Doctors takes place during season five, rather than after season six and the Doctor's trial, where most fans place it. This is probably the work of script editor Simon Guerrier, who took this stance in his audioplay The Black Hole, which dialogue suggests follows this straight after. Funnily enough, The Black Hole was a working title for The Three Doctors. If this is right after The Two Doctors, Jamie has met three extra incarnations of the Doctor in a matter of days.

The First Doctor mentions going to find Steven, so for him, this is presumably between The Daleks' Masterplan and The Massacre. 

REVIEW: Alien: Romulus

As either the seventh or ninth film in the franchise (depending on whether you count the Alien vs Predator crossovers), Alien: Romulus is up against a huge amount of nostalgia and expectation. It’s unlikely any new instalment will ever reach the heights of 1979’s Alien or 1986’s Aliens, yet the lukewarm reception of Ridley Scott’s return with his two prequel films means that Romulus is needed to revitalise the franchise.

Fortunately, it manages that, with a few caveats. Romulus is undoubtedly the best Alien film in years, balancing sci-fi and horror in a way the series hasn’t really managed since Aliens. It’s visceral, violent and unsettling, although less gorily over-the-top than I expected from Evil Dede Alverez. His script, with his regular collaborator Rodo Sayagues, is a decisive critique of the horrors of capitalism and unchecked growth. Setting the film between Alien and Aliens allows the writers to explore a largely unknown period in the series’ future history, giving us a story connected to Ripley’s without impacting it directly.

On the other hand, Romulus’ reliance on knowing references and slavish recreation of the past limits it originality. We have a new cast of characters to follow and root for, an effective updated design for the Alien (now officially named onscreen as Xenomorph XX-121) and a new corner of the universe to explore, yet we have an antagonist almost literally resurrected from Alien’s history and the repeated use of fan-pleasing old lines, regardless of whether it makes sense in context. Much of this is to be expected; we are, after all, living in the age of nostalgia. What I didn’t anticipate was the writers picking up a plot thread from Prometheus, unfortunately one that lacked much logic or coherence in the first place. This comes to the fore in the final act, derailing an otherwise impressive movie.

What can’t be faulted is the cast. While we have an uniformly young and beautiful set of protagonists – no room for the weird and wonderful in this future – they are all extremely impressive in what are solidly well-written roles. The characters are believable in a way we haven’t seen in this franchise for years, making mistakes and rash decisions that we could see ourselves making in the impossible situation in which they find themselves.

SPOILERS FROM HERE